Dark Shadows (2012)

In 18th century Maine, a witch (Eva Green, CASINO ROYALE) puts a curse on the lover (Johnny Depp) who spurned her in favor of another woman (Bella Heathcote). That curse turns him into a vampire and she has him buried alive. But 200 years later, he is accidentally dug up by construction workers. After massacring them and drinking their blood, he returns to his family home and acquaints himself with the surviving family dynasty. Director Tim Burton's reworking of the cult daytime soap opera isn't done with reverence for its source material so die hard fans of the show ... beware! What Burton has done, along with his screenwriter Seth Grahame-Smith (ABRAHAM LINCOLN, VAMPIRE HUNTER), has concocted a black comedy that is just as sophomoric and juvenile as it is witty. Depp's 18th century "fish out of water" vampire in the 20th century provides a few laughs as does Burton's arrows at the 1970s cultural landscape. But as spottily enjoyable as it all is, Burton doesn't go far enough. I mean if you're going to diss the 70s and trash the show, go all the way! He runs out of steam by the time of the special effects extravaganza that ends the film. Still, it's a major improvement over the ghastly ALICE IN WONDERLAND where he trashed Lewis Carroll. With Helena Bonham Carter, Jackie Earle Haley, Jonny Lee Miller, Chloe Grace Moretz (has there ever been a major film with so many three name actors?), Christopher Lee, Alice Cooper and as the family matriarch, Michelle Pfeiffer.